It still hasn’t gone away though.
—
I can go from being totally cheerful, loud, talkative to quiet, tired, and just downright gloomy just like that.
I’ve barely done anything today, and I’m more than rested from commuting earlier today, but holy fuck, I feel exhausted. I just kind of want to quietly curl up in bed and, I don’t know, have a staring contest with the wall or something.
It’s another one of those nights where I can barely hold up my end of a conversation because I literally cannot think of anything to say; my mind just draws a blank, and I end up spacing out, and I’m not entirely aware of how long I’ve been silent.
I’m actually genuinely sorry for anyone who tries to have a conversation with me when I get like this. My brain just pretty much shuts down, and all I want to do is lie in silence and kind of not do anything that requires too much effort. You know, like actively talking. (Aze, if you see this, I am so sorry omfg)
The problem, I guess, is that when I do get the chance to just not do anything, my thoughts wander, then everything goes on a downward spiral, and then the lethargy turns into an existential crisis, which turns into just a downright puddle of depression.
I’ve been like this for about two weeks now. Just on and off.
Blargh.
I’m tired.
I’m gonna go stand in the shower for like an hour or something now.
Maybe I’ll turn into a giant prune.
Prunes don’t get existential crises, right?
Leave a comment